the great mystery of the bicycle bracelet

1/2 fortnight past, (last Wednesday) a bracelet appeared on the handle bars of my poo poo thunder. I know not from whence it came or how it ended on the grip of my bicycle, but when I left class at 9PM I noticed it glimmering in the moonlight:

From Drop Box

Unfortunately, the individual who gifted the bracelet did not leave me a hand to put it on. So I was forced to provide my own. What if my hand had better things to do that day? Do anonymous jewelry givers even think? The nerve. Anyway.

The stones are mysterious black onyx that appear to have been forged in the fires of Orodurin. In spite of their fiery birth, they remain icy to the touch. Considering it's heft, I can only imagine the number of eagles it took to fly it across the lands. The stretchy band seems to made of elven genital hair...

to weird? Hells, we all know that's what Gimli really wanted anyway.

The poetic glory at :50 is what we're looking for my furry footed friends. Just skip to there and play it over and over with pride. Brahhh.. Its the dwarfs who go swimmin with little hairy women Brahhh.. Its the dwarfs who go swimmin with little hairy women Brahhh.. Its the dwarfs who go swimmin with little hairy women. See? It's even fun to read multiple times.

Keep in mind, I have no idea how any of this is relevant. Or if your feet are actually furry. If they are, that's fine. I'm sure your not alone.

But back to the bracelet. I've recreated the scene of the gifting:

From Drop Box

It appears that it was slipped over the end of my bar, where the force of gravity held it to the rubber grip like it was glue. I may never know who put the bracelet there (if anyone does know, they best come clean.)

In the meantime, an up and coming master of ceremonies is lovin his new chain

From Drop Box

Yeah son I squeak real good with this. Son.